Middlebury College VT 2006 (Off the Record)

Introduction from the Author

Coming to Middlebury is a throwback to the antiquated yet charming days of 1920s brick storefronts and wide roads designed for covered wagons—with the dearth of commerce and nightlife to match. The college itself is its own little “V-neck vortex” guarded from the outside world. Yet what it lacks in harsh reality, it makes up for in criminal amounts of schoolwork and daunting scholarly pretension. In short, Middlebury College is a gorgeous, granite utopia, overrun by the excessively ambitious, each with his or her own brainy complex—and that’s where the athletic North Face apparel comes in. Most “ordinary” folks will crack a short smile that belies sympathy when you tell them you go to Middlebury; the school reels of respect with the “learnèd” tier. Nearly all of the PhDs wandering about are well-acquainted with Middlebury’s reputation, and impressed with its students by default. Forty grand a year won’t just buy you an in-depth, well-rounded education, but some pricey prestige, as well—and it’s great to have the world assume you’re ambitious, intelligent, and informed, even if you spend your weekends drinking Jaigermeister and watching South Park.

As a result of its forward-moving consciousness, Middlebury claims some of the nation’s most amazing facilities, and the perfectly posh-pod people to match. If you’re ready to dabble in a diverse range of subjects before becoming wholly immersed in one area of focus, an upstanding liberal arts education is a fine fit. Although you will essentially be forced to flush your social life on the weekdays, the esteem you’ll graduate with will compensate for the alcohol poisoning you missed out on.

Middlebury students are a random rank of folks, and the quirky lifestyles they lead are contagious. The students—astute, yet spoiled “studyaholics,” wedged in the thrushes of the Green Mountains during the academic year, are adventurers, international travelers, volunteers, and overachieving interns outside of the sheltering College capsule. If you haven’t learned at least one obscure foreign language by graduation day, you’ll surely have learned how to scuba dive off the coast of Australia. And what will that get you? Well, a few great stories, and maybe even a job if you put in the effort. Middlebury can be a frighteningly intimidating experience, but it’s a surefire motivator, nonetheless. This college will light a flame under your flagging fanny.

Abbie Beane, Author
Middlebury College