13 Months Of Sassoon: A Diary Of Time

THU. APR. 10, 2008 - Better frame of mind than yesterday. Today, just confused. Periods of this. Could be the aging process. Times when the mind is clear like a beautiful sunshine-filled day in the Caribbean. Other times, it's a blur. Happiness and sadness may play a part in this. Confusion, like climbing the Golden Gate Bridge without ladders or other conveyances while a thick fog rolls in and rolls over. Other thoughts. Wonder if I'm revealing too much in my conversations? Thoughts unending. Are they useful? Strange, contorted thoughts. Is that good? Can be. Thinking is free as long as you keep it to yourself. However, moment you reveal your thoughts, the world pounces and you find yourself on the outside looking in. Secret, inner thoughts, wrapped around a cloak of amiability. Seems the way to go. When a student at McGill University, studied the Ismailiyya sect of Islam. Followers practiced Batin and Zahir. Batin is secret beliefs that you did not reveal to the outside world. Zahir is the external, which you show all. Here you exhibit Zahir game; wear the mask to reveal nothing while inwardly, your Batin is everything. Eastern philosophy of cloak and dagger. Time passing at work. Depressed. Why? Hard to unearth. The mind hides things. Mind and body not in sync, which is when the trouble starts. People acting out for internal reasons unknown to them; become aggressive as a result. Mind concealing the ideas. The individual disconnected. Underlining feelings building. Explosions. Back to reality. Leaving work soon. Back to the living. What is the living? I wonder. What will I be to the living one million years from now? Odd thought that goes no where but down into the depths. This is one entry from the daily diary of Elias Sassoon. It provides a glimpse into the mind of a literary genius, his visions, fears, household dramatics, and philosophical ruminations. Altogether, the book both entertains and raises appropriate questions about the world in which we live.