Enhancing your Interpersonal Communication Skills across Cultures ...

Text-only Preview

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Enhancing your Interpersonal Communication Skills across Cultures
by Donna Humphrey

Workshop Programme

Welcome and Coffee
Workshop aims and objectives

Introduction to NLP
The map is not the territory
Operating principles of NLP

Excellent communicators: what do they have in common?
Key elements of excellent communication

Introduction to Interpersonal Communication Skills

Building and maintaining rapport
Noticing skills – sensory acuity and calibration

Increasing and decreasing rapport
Sometimes we do not see ourselves as clearly as others see us

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Introduction to Inter-group Communication
Group purpose
Group communication
Effective group members

Inspirational team building quote
Create your own team building activity

Introduction to Intercultural Communication
Defining culture
The international profiler
Developing an intercultural mindset

Intelligence Test
Case study: a critical incident

Feedback and a final word

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Aims and objectives of the workshop

The workshop will provide a personal development course for individuals, who
seek to enhance their interpersonal communication skills across cultural
boundaries. The workshop allows participants to investigate their own
communication patterns and begin to identify and acknowledge the
communication style of others.

The workshop will focus on communication at three levels: the interpersonal, the
inter-group, and the intercultural.

At each level, participants will develop an awareness of their communication
skills and behavioural flexibility. They will recognise what creates good
communication and begin to understand how and why poor communication

At the end of this workshop participants will have an enhanced view of how they
communicate and how to improve relationships through good communication in
both 'one-to-one' and group situations.

The workshop will be dynamic and involve extensive group interaction. In this
experiential workshop they will learn skills for developing their personal and
professional effectiveness.

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Enhancing your Communication Skills

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Introduction to NLP

The workshop will use techniques drawn from NLP (Neuron-linguistic
programming), which is
often described as the "ultimate communications
strategy", by enhancing your influencing skills, you can build better rapport and
thus increase communication levels.
The workshop introduces the major
elements required to be successful in relationship building, that is to say rapport,
including pacing and leading, high level noticing skills, behavioural flexibility,
understanding people's 'strategies' behind their thinking and decision making.

Background to NLP

The co-developers of NLP are two Americans, Richard Bandler, a gestalt
therapist and computer programmer, and John Grindler, a linguist professor. At
the suggestion of the eminent anthropologist, Gregory Bateson, they analysed
some of the most foremost communicators and therapist to find out how and
what they were doing to create excellent communication. In particular, they
studied Milton Erickson, Fritz Perls and Virginia Satir, all leaders in their field.
From these three world-renowned therapists, they identified the specific verbal
and non-verbal strategies they used to achieve the success they did with clients.

Many of NLP’s tools and applications are widely used in business, sport,
management, education, training and therapy. Many of us have encountered and
applied these tools and applications in our life, without even realizing that it.

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]
Making Changes to Our Communication Style: the Map is not the Territory

Once we understand our own map of reality, we can begin to understand the
"maps" used by other people. Understanding other people’s maps of the world
can increase the depth and effectiveness of our personal and professional

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Workshop Presuppositions

This workshop makes presuppositions, based on NLP presuppositions.
Presuppositions or assumptions are the beliefs a person will find useful in
effecting changes to themselves and their communication style.

Examples of presuppositions:
If you always do what you have always done you will always get the
same results.
If what you are doing is not working, do something else.
People already have all the resources they need to achieve whatever
they want to achieve.
Behind every behaviour is a positive intention.
The meaning of a communication is the response you get.
If you aren't getting the response you want, try something different.
There is no such thing as failure. There is only feedback.
In any system, the element with the most flexibility exerts the most
The map is not the territory.
If someone can do something, anyone can learn it.
You cannot fail to communicate.
Having a choice is better than having no choice at all

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]

Communication Excellence

And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you -
ask what you can do for your country.
My fellow citizens of the world: ask not what America will do for you, but
what together we can do for the freedom of man.
Inaugural Address by John F. Kennedy - 1961
This is truly a celebration - a celebration of the

contributions women make in every aspect of life:

in the home, on the job, in their communities, as
You can see that "there is no easy walk to
mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, learners,
freedom anywhere, and many of us will have
workers, citizens and leaders.
to pass through the valley of the shadow (of
Women's Rights Are Human Rights Famous Speech by Hillary
death) again and again before we reach the
Clinton, Beijing, China, 1995
mountain tops of our desires.
No Easy Road to Freedom speech
by Nelson Mandela, 1953

I have a dream that my four children will one day
live in a nation where they will not be judged by
the colour of their skin but by the content of their
I have a dream today.
I Have a Dream speech by Martin Luther King, 1963

I have borne thirteen children, and seen
most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried
out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus
heard me! And ain't I a woman?
Ain't I a Woman? Famous Speech
by Sojourner Truth

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]


We communicate using 3 main channels of communication. Based on the
research of Albert Mehrabian (1972), each proportion influences and affects
the emotional impact of our communication.

Guess the % impact of the following on the messages we send…


Body language, gestures, facial expression etc.

Voice tone, pitch, pace, volume etc.

Actual words used

We are always communicating

© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]

Enhancing your interpersonal communication skills across cultures
[email protected]
Critics of Albert Mehrabian’s Communication Model
Mehrabian's model is a seminal piece of work, and it's amazingly helpful in explaining the
importance of careful and appropriate communications. Like any model, care must be exercised
when transferring it to different situations. Use the basic findings and principles as a guide and an
example - don't transfer the percentages, or make direct assumptions about degrees of
effectiveness, to each and every communication situation.
The model is particularly useful in illustrating the importance of factors other than words alone
when trying to convey meaning (as the speaker) or interpret meaning (as the listener), but care
needs to be taken in considering the context of the communication: Style, expression, tone, facial
expression and body language in Mehrabian's experiments did indeed account for 93% of the
meaning inferred by the people in the study, but this is not a general rule that you can
transfer to any given communications situation.
The understanding of how to convey (when speaking) and interpret (when listening) meaning will
always be essential for effective communication, management and relationships. But using the
Mehrabian percentages is not a reliable model to overlay onto all communications scenarios.
For example, Mehrabian's research involved spoken communications. Transferring the model
indiscriminately to written or telephone communications is not reliable, except to say that without
the opportunity for visual signs, there is likely to be even more potential for confused
understanding and inferred meanings.
I am grateful for the guidance of Ben Taylor in revising this guide to Mehrabian's communications
More information about Dr Albert Mehrabian and his fascinating work see his website.
Adapted from www.businessballs.com website
The use this material is free provided copyright (Alan Chapman 2004-06) is acknowledged and reference or link is made
to the. This material may not be sold, or published in any form. Disclaimer: Reliance on information, material, advice, or
other linked or recommended resources, received from Alan Chapman, shal be at your sole risk, and Alan Chapman
assumes no responsibility for any errors, omissions, or damages arising. Users of this website are encouraged to confirm
information received with other sources, and to seek local qualified advice if embarking on any actions that could carry
personal or organisational liabilities. Managing people and relationships are sensitive activities; the free material and
advice available via this website do not provide all necessary safeguards and checks. Please retain this notice on all
© alan chapman 2004-2006; Businessballs 1995-2006.
© Donna Humphrey 2006. [email protected]