Why the Proctor Silex Coffee Maker Model: 48524 Sucks Ass

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Why the Proctor Silex Coffee Maker Model: 48524Sucks AssI S S U E S I N P R O D U C T D E S I G N© 2010 . Justice Mitchell© 2010 . . All Rights ReserJustice MitchellvedThe BasicsThere are few joys in the advertising field, here’s what we do know:•Clients hate you and think you could be replaced with a bag of hair•Your cubicle smells like the last person that was fired•Your dreams are crushed daily by lack of budget or interest in your brilliance•Account Executives think up ways to undermine you nightly•Someone stole your ‘Lucky Cat’ and you know it was that asshole in the mail-room•Anti-depressants and Coffee are the one-two-combo that keeps you from working at Kinko’s© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 2The Vessel of CreationThere are very few things that a coffee maker needs to do:•Be easy to operate•Be easy to prepare the process•Contain liquids at a suitable temperature•Perform its God-given task of creating brain nectar© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 3Why we’re here: Let’s Review“Product design can be defined as the idea generation, concept development, testing and manufacturing or implementation of a physical object or service. Product Designers conceptualize and evaluate ideas, making them tangible through products in a more systematic approach.”http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Product_designIn layman's terms:•Design it•Test it (but wait here’s the catch in this phase, you need to fix it if it ‘sucks ass’)•Launch/Promote it•Pray for no recalls having burned down a trailer park•Rinse and repeatLet us begin...© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 4Enter: The Devil’s AlbatrossThe Proctor Silex Coffee Maker:•Model: 48524•Series: C0480CN•Type A43 Coffee Maker•For “Household” Use Only – (This inherently could be the problem as the device is located at my place of business. Though we once made an intern stay overnight so it could be called a ‘home away from home’ I suppose.)•US Patent D543,770© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 5Issue 1. “The Groove”The Proctor Silex Model 48524 Coffee Maker has a ‘convenient’ groove for your filtration reservoir to fit into to insure that you will never be able to get the lid closed unless you own a micrometer and an overabundance of patience.© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 6Issue 2. “The Dribble Lip”The Proctor Silex Model 48524 Coffee Maker has an inadequate lip for pouring more than a rate of .05oz / second. I just made that up. But regardless, I’ve never filled the water chamber nor have I poured coffee into another vessel without the repercussion of it running down and off of the coffee pot housing.© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 7Issue 3. “Surprise! You’re Mopping”The Proctor Silex Model 48524 Coffee Maker has a hollow handle on the bottom end of the coffee pot. Seems logical that you minimize the amount of plastic during the fabrication process and I’m sure that there’s some reason that closing the bottom is also problematic. What’s this additionally does is harbor all the water that it can store during a dishwashing cycle only to come flying out upon rotation.© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 8Issue 4. “The Moat”The Proctor Silex Model 48524 Coffee Maker has very little room to pour the liquid into the containment reservoir. Tack on “The Dribble Lip” and you have a comedy of errors as you try your best to fill the machine. Did I mention that you’re barely awake during this process?© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 9Issue 5. “The Destiny Controller”The Proctor Silex Model 48524 Coffee Maker lastly has a cryptic switch on the top that is in theory supposed to control the amount of fluid that passes over your ground angel epidermis. Being a designer I can tell you that if my client let this neo-depiction of ‘Asteroids’ pass I would have bought a lotto ticket.© 2010 . Justice Mitchell . All Rights ReservedPage 10